- Nurse and reality TV star Kimmi Scott said chemotherapy and radiation decreased her sex drive and stopped her from orgasming.
- Despite these changes, Kimmi said she still wants sex with her husband Maurice.
- At first, Kimmi said she faked orgasms. Now, patience and open communication are helping her navigate the change.
Kimmi Scott refused to let her changing body get in the way of intimacy with her husband Maurice Scott. Despite a sudden breast cancer diagnosis and a year of exhausting chemotherapy that made it feel impossible to reach orgasm, Kimmi wanted to have sex.
The 34-year-old nurse and reality television star was diagnosed with triple negative breast cancer in June 2022 after she found two lumps, in her right breast and under her right arm, while doing a self-exam.
Because of the aggressive nature of her diagnosis (triple negative breast cancer spreads more quickly than other forms of breast cancer), Kimmi underwent 20 weeks of chemotherapy, then 36 rounds of radiation.
Throughout this, Kimmi said she hadn't climaxed once, and she noticed that her sex drive decreased dramatically.
Married for five years, Kimmi and Maurice have shared much of their life on the Oprah Winfrey Network's six-season television series "Love & Marriage: Huntsville." But when Kimmi received her diagnosis, she was unsure if she wanted to continue showing the depths of their life for viewers.
After talking about it with Maurice, Kimmi decided that sharing her story could be educational.
She said season six, which is still airing, gives an honest look at how her vibrant life shifted during her breast cancer treatment. The season shows vulnerable moments, including her decision to fake orgasms while having sex with Maurice. Though she's finished treatment, Kimmi told Insider that their sex life still looks different than it did before the diagnosis.
Faking orgasms and managing expectations
At first, Kimmi was worried that her inability to orgasm was a sign she'd fallen into a deep depression.
But after speaking with a friend who had also undergone chemotherapy, Kimmi learned that it's normal for the treatment to mess with a patient's libido and ability to climax. That knowledge allowed her to readjust expectations about sex with Maurice, Kimmi said.
She told Insider that she tried "everything" to climax during partnered sex, including different types of foreplay, romantic dinner dates, and cuddling before the main event. But when nothing seemed to work, Kimmi decided to view sex as an opportunity to connect with her husband and make him feel good.
She said that before her cancer diagnosis, Maurice already had a higher sex drive than she did. But when Kimmi waves of nausea and exhaustion from chemotherapy, their differences in desire became more apparent.
"We were talking about more sex before this cancer journey, so I was wondering how he was handling the journey at this point," Kimmi said.
On the show, Kimmi tells a friend that she's been faking orgasms during sex with Maurice. When speaking with Insider, Maurice said he didn't realize his wife was faking until he saw that scene on television.
He previously said that it was "admirable" that Kimmi put his sexual desires first. "There's a difference between wants and needs, and I'm a person who actually needs sex," Maurice said during an interview on Carlos King's podcast "Reality with the King," sparking criticism from fans who called him selfish, according to Metro UK.
Maurice told Insider that he's embarrassed about how he described their sex life during that interview, and aims to support Kimmi. Meanwhile, Kimmi said she didn't feel pressured into sex with him.
"In my head I'm like, 'Girl, I wanna have sex too. This is important to me too,'" Kimmi said.
Taking the good days, and the bad, as they come
As a nurse, Kimmi said that she knew a lot about cancer before her diagnosis. But that wealth of information was overwhelming.
To keep her mind off anxiety-provoking thoughts, Kimmi said that her loved ones quite literally surrounded her, bringing her home-cooked meals, showing up unannounced to chat while perched atop her bed, and giving her homemade lotions to help with radiation burns and scarring. Fans of the show also sent gifts and letters of support, which lifted her spirits.
Kimmi said it's a struggle being unable to enjoy sex the way she used to, but having honest conversations with Maurice about her mental and physical state helps immensely.
"Sometimes it's like, 'We just not gonna get none today, and it's OK,'" Kimmi said. "It's just a matter of both of us being patient with the process."
ncG1vNJzZmivp6x7o8HSoqWeq6Oeu7S1w56pZ5ufonystcymoGark6TBtXnLqK2eZZ2Wv7O1wKCcZquVrXqlwdGipaBlk5a7pLHRZqurnZGpuqa602ZpaWpjYoU%3D